The Time The Boy….

 

Took down 2 Uncles. And 1 Pap.

Over the summer during our one week away adventure we were surrounded by aunts and uncles and a granny and pap and one cousin. Miss Thing desperately wanted a sleep over, as we were all in different units. And her aunts desperately want to do whatever she begged for. So we worked up a plan. We would have a girls night in one unit. And have snacks and paint nails and watch a movie. Then Little Miss and I would go back to our unit and Miss Thing could have her sleepover with the aunts.

This is what our “girls night” consisted of, MT painting all our toes. She was in heaven.

The boys would gather in another and watch a movie. Of course “the boys” consisted of 2 uncles, The Boy and Pap. I told the uncles to put on a movie and with all that we had done that day The Boy would most likely crash. The one thing I failed to mention: never fall asleep first.

Never. Fall. Asleep. First.

Which was how he took down the first uncle. And from there he just gained momentum. It seemed the more momentum he gained the less energy the uncles had.

Once his movie was over, or he was over it, he was far from crashing. He quickly took the DVD out of the player, put it away, found a new one, put it in and then put on his best clueless look. He acted like he didn’t know what to do next (push the eject button to close the little drawer) and the uncles fed right into it. They quickly rushed to his aid and both of them huddled around the little DVD player. Anxious to please The Boy. You see once they were focused on something else he had them right where he wanted them.

So he left.

He knew he was at the lesser of the cool parties and he wanted in on the coolest one. He was determined to find it.

The uncles, of course, quickly noticed his exit and quickly went after him. He laughed like it was the biggest of jokes. It was all a game. And he was winning.

Another time, again when all backs were turned, he found a knife in the kitchen and welded it like he was ready for a sword fight. Did I mention he was gaining momentum?

The poor pap thought there was something seriously wrong with The Boy. He left mid-evening convinced he needed to speak with The Boy’s father about his wild behavior.

I came back sometime after 10 to find The Boy wide awake and bouncing off walls and the uncles in a heap on the couch. They quickly left. Although not before I heard, “You said it would be easy.” It wasn’t until later that I pieced together the full story.

All I know is that in 5 minutes I had The Boy in bed. And in 10 he was out.

Never. Fall. Asleep. First.